Using Our Heart in Daily Living
“A journey through mud
Yet un-tinted by the mud
An awakening” - soon lee
Introduction
Before we can start explorig how to use our heart in daily living we need to understand some basics about our heart. Our heart actually operates in three different realms:
The Absolute Realm is our True Heart which is pure and un-corrupted. Whereas the Physical & Relative realms refer to the Heart of Desires and the Human Heart which are somewhat affected by the egoistic mind. But before I can start talking about how we use our Heart in daily living, do we know which realm of our Heart is driving us in our daily living today? May be the first question should be: “What Heart should I using in everyday living?”. The obvious answer is, of course we should use our True Heart in everyday living. But what we should do is often quite different from what we actually do. So, how do you know when you are not using your True Heart in your everyday living? Are you aware of some of the obstacles that might stop you from living your life fully?
Obstacles that stop us from living life fully
They are many obstacles that can stop us from living life fully. For example, busyness, anger, hatred, arrogance, desires, greed, impatience, ignorance etc. Let’s talk about couple of these obstacles.
Busyness: Are you too busy? Have you ever sat down and considered just what it means to be too busy? If you haven't, then there's a good chance that you are too busy, that your activities and work in your life are causing you to neglect other areas of your life that are or should be extremely important to you. For example, doing things that bring joy to your life, your health, your families etc. etc.
Quote: May I never get too busy in my own affairs that I fail to respond to the needs of others with kindness and compassion- Thomas Jefferson
Anger: I feel very bad for angry people, for I see them creating their own hells to live in, and they usually don't even realize it. When I'm tempted to react angrily myself, I will use the 3rd Treasure and also try to remember to ask myself this question: Am I contributing to the anger in the world, or am I contributing to the peace and love in the world? Love is the only power that can cause a permanent change.
Quote: As a girl my temper often got out of bounds. But one day when I became angry at a friend over some trivial matter, my mother said to me, "Elizabeth, anyone who angers you conquers you." - Sister Elizabeth Kenny
Guiding Lamp of our Heart: Now, if we are facing all these obstacles, this basically tells us we are lost in our journey of life. So what happened to the lamp of our Heart that supposed to guide us through our life journey?
Quote: Bible Matthew 6:22: “The eye is the lamp of the body. If the lamp is lit, the body will shine. If the lamp is not lit, the body will be in darkness.”
So what happened to the lamp of our Heart? Did we lose it? No, just like the sun during rainy day, even though we cannot see it, it is still there. It is obscured by layers and layers of thick cloud. This is often referred to as the veil of ignorance. The thick veil of ignorance that covers up the lamp of our Heart is none other than the obstacles we identified earlier. Since we lost our inner GPS (Global Positioning System) we became more and more reliance on external things like material things, images, sounds, other’s opinions, expert’s advice, media, knowledge, beauty etc. etc. to guide us in living our lives, without realizing that all these external things are impermanent and unreliable. Following these external guidance will unfortunately lead us further and further down the wrong track! So what do we need to do to find our way back to the right path?
Rekindle the Lamp of the Heart
We need to rekindle the lamp of our heart. In another words, we need to get in touch or connect with our True Nature or Buddha Nature by peeling away the many layers of veils of ignorance. Confucius has some great advice for us.
Quote: The Great Learning by Confucius
If one’s heart has greed and desire, the True Nature is deviated.
If one’s heart has resentment and hatred, the True Nature is blocked.
If one’s heart has ignorance, the True Nature is muddled.
If one’s heart has likes and wants, the True Nature is shifted.
I am sure somewhere along our life journey we all experienced greed, desire, resentment, wants etc. Then it is no wonder the lamp of our heart is no longer shining. Confucius continues:
Abstaining from greed, one can upright the deviated Nature.
Extinguishing resentment & hatred, one can clear the blocked Nature.
Reducing ignorance, one can clear the muddled Nature.
Ridding one's likes and wants, one can stop the shifting Nature.
What is living life with my heart?
Living life with my heart basically means doing things full-heartedly and living life full-heartedly. This sounds very simple but may be not so easy to put into practice. (What do you think?) Actually, doing things full-heartedly and living life full-heartedly, these are part of the natural flow of things – provided they are not interfered by the human egoistic mind. This is referred to as “Wu Wei”.
Quote: Tao Te Ching Chapter II
Wu Wei (??) literally means ‘non-doing’, but as a philosophical concept it is used to characterize spontaneity and naturalness of action devoid of conscious premeditation, and implies non-intervention in the natural flow of things. To achieve the level of wu wei one requires consistent effort and practice. For example, driving a car. Initially learning to drive a car requires a lot of effort and practice. You have to “think” of every action. But after lots of effort and practice your actions or doing seem to become “effortless” and devoid of the mind. Doing everyday things full-heartedly in the present moment without any attachments would gradually help us to reach the level of Wu Wei. Ultimately it is to live our daily life effortlessly!
Story: One Day ….
A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package:
'This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package.'
He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.
'She got this the first time we went to New York 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on. She was saving it for a special occasion.
Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died.
He turned to me and said: 'Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion'.
I still think those words changed my life.
Now I read more and clean less.
Learning to use our Heart in everyday living
Life simply is harmonious and the only question is whether we see that harmony or not. Those who know how to tune into that harmony are able to live life to it's fullest potential. How do we tune into that harmony? How do we achieve that sense of inner peace and freedom?
Understanding karma and our True Nature: Karmic events (good or bad) are forever changing and they are results of the chain of causes and effects. On the other hand, our True Nature is our original nature and it is unchanging and indestructible. If we understand this, then we do not want to just generate good karma or neutralize bad karma but gain wisdom by getting in touch with our True Nature or Buddha Nature, so that our actions are driven by our conscience not by external stimuli.
Quote: Maturity, The Responsibility of Being Oneself by Osho: “To do good work is one thing, and to be good is totally another. It is better to let good works come out of your being good.”
Accepting the impermanence of life: I think we all understand the impermanence of life. But I don’t think we accept this fact. (Do you agree?) As a result we are constantly, fighting & struggling and creating suffering & conflicts on a daily basis e.g. fear, anxiety, stress etc. We are trying to create eternal life using things from the material world of impermanence. Doesn’t this sound insane? Only acceptance i.e. letting go of these impermanent attachments will set us free.
The Middle Way & Creating Balance.
Quote: Buddha – The middle way and Tao Te Ching Chap 2: Yin & Yang – Creating balance.
For example, living life with a heart of gratitude & appreciation. This attitude alone will help us to create great harmony in our lives. With a heart of gratitude: when something good happens to you, you will appreciate it but not try to possess it. When something bad happens to you, you will ask: “Why did it happen for me?” and try to learn the lesson from it.
Nurturing our Soul/Spirit. Sometime we are so caught up with our busy life that we forget how to live life anymore. We take everything around us for granted. We neglect our families and friends. We live life in the extreme end etc. We no longer know how or when to stop. We don’t know how to get off the “fast lane”. So, How to stop? Self-reflection or forced by circumstances?
Story: My friend Sam
Like me, Sam loved playing badminton. Life was good for Sam. He has a lovely young family and a well paid engineering job. Two years ago he broke his ankle during one of the badminton games. It was a serious injury and he had to have ankle reconstruction. After the operation he was unable to walk for almost half a year. During that time he was confined to bed and a wheelchair. Simple tasks became a big challenge. He had to depend on others for daily activities that he used to take for granted. Sam was off the “fast lane”. He had plenty of time to think and reflect while laying in bed.
He started to realize how selfish he was, how he had neglected his family, how he took for granted all the little but important things in life etc. Sam was lucky to have the opportunity to reflect (even though it was forced on him) and he was wise enough to understand that it was a wake-up call for him. Now Sam makes sure he spend time with his family. He also makes sure there is a clear boundary between work and private life. He takes time off for himself regularly e.g. going for a walk in the forest.
“Stopping is the beginning of living”.
Living a life of Contentment i.e. knowing what is enough. E.g. Financial freedom is not about having billion of dollars, big houses etc.
Story: The Emperor & his Horseman
A long time ago, there was an Emperor who told his horseman that if he could ride on his horse and cover as much land area as he likes, then the Emperor would give him the area of land he has covered. Sure enough, the horseman quickly jumped onto his horse and rode as fast as possible to cover as much land area as he could. He kept on riding and riding, whipping the horse to go as fast as possible. When he was hungry or tired, he did not stop because he wanted to cover as much area as possible.
Came to a point when he had covered a substantial area and he was exhausted and was dying. Then he asked himself, "Why did I push myself so hard to cover so much land area? Now I am dying and I only need a very small area to bury myself."
The above story is similar with the journey of our Life. We push very hard everyday to make more money, to gain power and recognition. We neglect our health, time with our family and to appreciate the surrounding beauty and the hobbies we love.
One day when we look back, we will realize that we don't really need that much, but then we cannot turn back time for what we have missed.
Life is not about making money, acquiring power or recognition. Life is definitely not about work! Work is only necessary to keep us living so as to enjoy the beauty and pleasures of life. Life is a balance of Work and Play, Family and Personal time. You have to decide how you want to balance your Life.
Making the right Choices: Living life is a choice we all can make - Positive or Negative. Ask yourself, why does the disease “Mondaylitis” exist? So choose to be happy. Connect with the limitless joy within by doing everything full-heartedly and mindfully. (All is required is a shift in your mindset). When you stop doing things that bring joy to your life –“BEWARE!”
Quote: Divine Teaching (Shi Zun Lao Da Ren): In whatever position that is within my responsibility, I shall carry out what I should be doing with love; I shall accomplish it willingly without any regrets.
Using the 3 Treasures: Of course being Tao Cultivators we are blessed with the 3 Treasures that we can use to help us to achieve and maintain the harmony in our lives.
1st Treasure: Helps to calm and center your heart. If your heart is calm and focused you will be to connect with your True Nature and live life with your true heart.
2nd Treasure: In everyday living we will be confronted by various events that might disturb the calmness in our heart. Using the 2nd Treasure will help us to buffer our heart from the negative influences of these external stimuli.
3rd Treasure: Helps us to constantly contemplate and reflect on our conducts and treatment towards others. “In spiritual terms, we are all brothers and sisters. Only by constantly reminding ourselves of our mutual spiritual connection and relationship can we start to show empathy and compassion towards other fellow human beings.”
Cultivating Tao diligently – Participating in Tao work and live Tao in your daily life (ritual meditation, servicing, home visiting, organizing activities, attending Tao talks & workshops etc.) Understanding what is cultivation is very important. Cultivation is more than participating in Tao work. You also need to make Tao an integral part of your daily living. We must not treat Tao cultivation something separate from our daily living.
Quote: What is self-cultivation? (Zen Speaks Page 80) - Self-cultivation refers to all the details of everyday life that should be done with care and sincerity. If performed in this way, every little task will resonate with the Truth.
Some of the benefits of using our heart in daily living
Living Life: We will be living life instead of just surviving. Do you prefer to live life or just surviving? Living life gives you a sense of freedom and choice whereas surviving is like slavery. There are many examples in our daily living: rat race, material or money persuade etc.
Learning:Quote: (Confucius) “Eager to learn is close to understanding”.
When we use our heart in daily living we cultivate our eagerness to learn – just like children. Learning and understanding Tao helps us to accept that the teaching of truth is real and the decree of Heaven is real.
Knowing when and how to stop helps us to nurturing our soul/spirit. Taking time off to go for a walk in the bush or garden does not make us a million dollars or getting our work done, but it helps to nurture our soul and brings balance back into our lives.
Getting rid of the obstacles: The obstacles we identified earlier will gradually disappear. In another words the veils of ignorance will be lifted bit by bit and the lamp of our heart will start to shine through. This will start and guide us on the path to enlightenment.
Conclusion
Song: “Don’t Worry. Be Happy”. Be present and focused in what you are doing. Don’t let the egoistic mind takes you back to the past or forward to the future. Do things that bring joy to your life. Know the difference between “worrying” and “thinking”. It is a bit like the difference between “loneliness” and “solitude”.
Quote: (Confucius) Five Steps of Cultivation:
Only by knowing where to dwell can one gain stillness.
Only by having stillness can one gain calmness.
Only by having calmness can one gain peace.
Only by having peace can one gain contemplation.
Only by having contemplation can one truly gain.
We have explored the meaning of living life with our heart and the various ways we can use to help us to live life with our heart. This is good knowledge to have. But this knowledge is of little use to us unless we can start putting it into practice in our daily living. So how do we make this first step? Just like after you have received the precious Tao, you have to make a conscious choice / a decision to walk the path. This requires effort, faith and commitment. Learning to use our Heart in daily living is no different. You need to start now and “just do it”. Don’t let “I don’t know enough” stops you from making the first step. Your true learning comes when you are on the journey. The good news is, you will have many Tao brothers and sisters who will walk with you, learn with you and support you on this life journey.
